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My Life Is Like a SuitcaseParanoia is me, as I lit another cigarette,,Sorry for all my violent words,there was something wrong,there were too many shadows,too many voices,I packed myself away,My life is like a suitcase,.The sloppy teen hanging limply over the chairblack smudged eyeliner,tired swollen eyes,staring blankly at the computer screen,hoping to find something,to kill the pain,only to find more pain,..unable to pull her fingers away from the letters that spell your name,she can't even arrange the words that she writes about her lifeMy room is like wonderland to me,but a junkyard to her,I am the music blasting into my head,I am a few stickers left on the wall,I am a skeleton hiding in my own closet,the way I always run my fingers through my hair,memories in the glass windows,All that I left behind in my prison,crumpled beer cans, piled over the trash can,the many price tags, I can never have enough,some of my hair tangled into the carpet,red lipstick on the cigarettes in the as
BlindI turn to my pale princeMy dreamsMy fantasyThis delusionMy ink and paperTo see my blue eyed hero again
Vacant mindI cannot open my eyesI don't want to see the childrenI cannot breathWith you twisting my lungs into knotsI cannot liveWith you pumping your dreams into my veinsHands shakyFrom breathing you in too muchHallucinating from your sickly sweetnessI light another cigaretteWith a curl of lipsBlow my cares awayBut I am choking on bitter wordsI don't want to love you, anymoreI don't want to drown in the shadow of your 'Greatness'I just wanted to be squeezed,Into the gooey sticky mess of your heart,And be enveloped by the warmth of youAnd be wrapped around your finger foreverBut I am left on the front porchIn the cold darkTo rot away my lifeI want to escape youRid myself of your chainsGrow back my wingsAnd just fly away
Termination of the master disguisePray for tomorrowWatery sorrowDated desperadoTouch lingersGolden fingersForgotten feelingsReckless dealingsGlazed eyesFancy tiesSilent prayersleft caresblood bathStabbing wrathHidden pathChewed nailsHorror talesGory detailsDevilish scalesFlesh woundSqueaking soundSick showScarecrowSkinny bonesTeenage clonesAngry tonesMy dearYou called me a QUEERWhy do you sneerMy depressionNext obsessionJudging my artThrow another dartTo my bleeding heartDripping angerWilted wreathSharp teethBlue eyesThat I now despiseLets cheersTo waisted yearsAnd silver tearsBut this is the endFor us my friend
Spector violenceLets just take a breakI heard from the snakeThat I should drown myself in the lakeI watch my broken clockShaky hand knockPicking at the lockSilly fools of humanityDressing up vanityFalling into insanityShip wreckedBrain checkedLets recollectTake a breathStop thinking about our deathI'm called a freakI can't speakBeing picked on, for being weakRebel teensScene queensSkinny jeansMean machinesDeafening screamsI will never sleepNighty nite creepOcean deepRivers weepI will never slayI want to stayWatch you decayOn my wrist she wroteher death notethen slit her own throatIn my headI'm already deadBut I push aheadTerribly misreadMy baby's deadSplatters of redSkin thats been shredTheir dead faces won't believethe heart on my sleeveI don't want to grieveBut they told me to leaveI've been cheatedMy name deletedHatefully greetedBody bagsWhite flags
EmptinessI bury myself under soft coversLetting the warmth be my comfortThis darkness becomes my reflectionI lie down, forsakenWHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?!Pain wracks my chestRibs shakingBones achingI weepLetting all my despairs outfor the first time in yearsLetting my heartache pour from my eyesFeeling abusedThe pain in my chest increasesSpreading through my whole bodyI accept that i'm gonna die soonI surrender to the sound of my sobbingI feel the warm tears dripping from my eyelashes After all these years,..Why am I still so aloneThis veil is my shieldI hide behind a fake smileLike armourTo cover up my woundsbeneath the metalI hide from themThose who stole my happinessEven my teddy has left me alone tonightAfter being rejectedFor the third time todayMy stronghold burstsAll the walls of protection comes crashing downLeaving my centre defencelessI roll into a tight ballCovering my broken heartI embrace the darkness that surrounds meThe shadows beco
Dearest OctoberBlock and lightRed and fight Black and white Fire tonight Whats in sight My last plight Your long height My Dark knightSkinny jeansGirly screams Twisted dreams Torn seams My wrist bleeds My hearts pleadsLost on the groundGone without a sound My hands are bound
ForgivenessI am a shadow of your pastI am human no moreBut a ghostHaunting your sleepless nightsI am a forsaken soulWithin your dreams of deathI don't want to be here any longerI don't want to see your faceWith tears glinting on your pale skinUpon your dying breathI set your soul freeOn the frozen windsOf my ice cold heart
Just one more cutSweaty palmsSlippery fingersBlade in handArm exposedMany old scarsI know I have a choiceMy knife,Or my penBut maybe just one more sliceJust another one won't make a differenceMaybe no one will noticeThrough red, bloodshot eyesAnd tear stained cheeksA broken but beating heartThoughts at warMaybe he won't mind the cutsMaybe he really doesn't careOne sliceAnother tiny drop of bloodstinging painNow I know I can still feelNow I know that I am still humanI still exist hereI'm not really a invisible ghost like they sayThat has no emotionsThis pain is whats realPain is the only thing left that can chain me to reality